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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

A little more of less

Life, as I see it, is a perfect recipe of shattered hopes, overwhelming success with a well mixed garnish of inexplicable happiness coupled with unbearable pain. The happiness of gain and the resulting fear of loss of someone or something dear to us shows the very dilemma of life.

When I sit on my roof; which overlooks the neighbourhood, on one side I see people lying, backstabbing, masking, using others as tools, showing shameless greed and displaying every single human vice I can think of. Still, these people keep complaining about the sadness and bitterness of life, keep saying how life has become complicated and what if it could be changed. I am not disapproving of their way of life balancing it on the scale of virtues and vices. They do things which are practical, atleast in their points of view. But in the end they are not sure whether they are doing the right thing or not. Are they being practical or evil? Is the path on which they are going will ultimately take them where they will find what they “actually” want from their lives? Or will it keep them jailed in their own web of decitful practicality?

And on the other side, I see a handful of people who are satisfied with what they have, however little it maybe; people who show their very naked souls through their eyes, whose hearts are filled with generosity, kindness, fear of God and a desire to live their lives as happily as they can despite its shortcomings. These people greet everyone with open hearts, talk of God and Human Virtues, and despite seeing immeasurable failures in life, they still say life is a cake-walk. They walk with their own dignity, not caring what the other side of the world cares about them. They too have complaints about their lives, how desperate they are to get a little more of less they have in their lives, to complete it, without compromising with their way of life, hoping that the path of dignity in which they are walking is indeed a right choice. They too are unsure whether their path is right, but they just walk on, with a smile in heart alongside a hope, that their path will lead them to discover what they “actually” wanted from life.

I always wonder, how two different versions of the same life come from two different versions of the same Human Being, which infact ends in the same quest. The only explanation I feel satisfies me is that everything is a illusion. Our whole life is our own illusion. It is a super-natural, impulsive force which makes us drive our lives the way we want, but makes us end up getting nothing that we “actually” desired.

God made man in his own image. Its up to us to figure it all out; right, wrong, good, evil. In each of us lies the capacity to decide what drives our actions. So what is it that makes some choose selflessness: the need to devote oneself to something greater, while others know only self interest, isolating themselves in a world of their own making? Some seek love even if unrequited, while others are driven by fear and betrayal. There are those who see their choices as dark proof of God's absence while others follow a path of noble destiny. But in the end, good, evil, right or wrong, what we choose is never what we need, for that is the ultimate cosmic joke, the real gift that God has left behind.


Phoenix said...

Funny, last night I was also getting philosophical and my thoughts headed perpendicular to yours. The coincidence becomes interesting when I recollect that as you were on your roof, I was also out in the balcony. May be the darkness of the night did it to us. Unable to look at the world, probably, we started looking into ourselves.

I shall not comment on your post because it is the beginning of your exploration and I believe at the beginning unrestrained exploration is better. However, I would like to see the progress.

Prasannajeet™ said...

@ Phoenix:
Thank you for giving a reasonable explanation to my rather unusual outburst of emotion. I was glad to hear you sharing my thoughts. Its has been a few years since such feelings have kept me awake at night and baffled in the day. Whenever I don't find an explanation to my questions I start looking inside the hearts of the men and women and they become the subject of my thoughts, swimming through their complex emotions, until I find a satisfactory explanation.

swaruparani sahu said...

seems were very overwhelmed with emotions&philosophies at the time of writing this blog...words...overflowing like riverwater!
a matured piece of work...

Prasannajeet™ said...

Thanx Dear, that's really a special comment for me :)