No one will disagree with me when I say that moments of separation are perhaps the most difficult moments in any person’s life. Perhaps what’s more trying than the aftermath of separation is the feeling of helplessness moments before the separation. The fading twilight of hope, of avoiding the inevitable, lights up even the bravest of minds. This hope sometimes overpowers us, makes us attempt to do things beyond our ken and which will never change anything. Be it jumping from the edge of the cliff trying to hold the hand the our falling loved one, or the last minute prayers of mercy to the Almighty to stop the departing soul in order to see our loved one alive for one more moment, a moment which might well redefine our life and give it a new direction. Or be it a relationship gone astray and destined to be ended, despite unwillingness from both sides, but must be done to avoid further sourness.
Despite all our last moment attempts before the mishap, the very moment when we get the feeling that something bad is actually happening and we cant stop it, the moment when our limbs fail to move and our brain stops its thoughts, we watch, as the sun of hope sets down below the mountain of agony, pain and unbearable hurt. These moments leave a scar, sometimes so deep, it virtually changes for us the meaning of life and our objective of living.
Some choose to become Messengers of God, deciding to lessen the pains of others by doing virtuous deeds sacrificing and destroying their very emotions which led to their sorrows: greed, lust, attraction….. the list goes on. Some who are not strong, get consumed by the poison of the situation and end their lives, unable to bear the sudden impulse of the emotional impact on them. Some very brave ones, lead on with their normal lives, absorbing the complete storm of anguish inside their hearts. But they too, never end their day without shedding one tear thinking about the pain.
But few just stay there, at that point of time unable to move even one step ahead. They just keep gazing at that moment, that very moment which changed everything, and made their apparently happy lives come to a halt. They become deaf to the sounds of carnivals and blind even to the audacious of colours. They just remain mute spectators of their own disaster.
The irony of separation is far more complex than what meets the eye. The agony, the pain and the hopelessness it gives to us is sometimes of such enormous amount that it makes us lose faith on the very ideals on which our lives are based. Few chosen ones have the courage and strength to put the shock behind and move on with ahead with their lives. But many just get consumed by the monstrous darkness of this disgraceful agony. They tend to hide from their own lives, from their past happiness. They just want to get lost in a crowd where nobody knows them nor they know anybody. They hide themselves even from their own reflection.
This is the very insanity of separation, that its virtually a compass of our lives. Like it, or hate it, it is inevitable. Like others, this is also one the beautiful creations of God. The pain of the past drives us to the uncertainty of the future, making us sometimes unaware of our present. This is the story of every evil and every sin, that a pain creates agony, and an uncontrolled agony gives birth to rage and then sin. This is the truth of separation, a daring example of the very insanity of the same.